Friday, February 22, 2013

Just Slow Down

On Wednesday when Caleb finished his session at Nido, we noticed Nathan's class was in the hall beside the Nido classroom. Caleb was so excited to see his big brother at school he ran across the hall towards Nathan. I quickly ran after Caleb, grabbed him and brought him outside, not wanting to disturb Nathan's PE class.

As Caleb stood outside with his face pressed up against the large pane of glass, he asked over and over, "'tay? moch Nadan peas?" (Stay? Watch Nathan, please?).

I can't even remember why I was in such a big rush to leave, but I picked Caleb up and as I walked towards the car, giving him no chance to argue, I explained to him that we couldn't stay because it would distract Nathan's class.

That night, I felt so guilty.

As Caleb gets older, I'm realizing that this may very well be the last time I get to see one of my own children at this young, innocent age admiring their older sibling.

All Caleb wanted to do was watch his big brother. I doubt the older kids would have even noticed or cared that he was there and yet somehow, I decided that his presence on the other side of the glass was too much of an intrusion and I took away his rare opportunity to watch his brother, whom he admires so much, play with the big parachute.

It broke my heart that I couldn't go back and have a second chance.

But it was also a really good reminder for me to just slow down and say "Yes" once in a while.

Today after school, I got my chance.

Nathan asked if he could stay and play until 4pm. To him, that's hitting the jackpot. We ended up staying until after 5pm.

Nathan asked if he could buy lemonade from a market stall some of his classmates had set up. I offered to buy him and Caleb one so they wouldn't have to fight share. Caleb eventually got a muffin as well.

For 2 hours after school, the boys ran free. They played with their friends, they chased bubbles and they didn't have a mother standing over them, telling them it was almost time to go.

The weather was absolutely gorgeous this afternoon.

It's like God was giving me a second chance to slow down and say "Yes" to my boys and I'm so grateful for it.


  1. oh dont beat yourself up!!! sometimes you do have to go and even though it is is life!!
    id say just grab those times like today where you have nothing else on let those times be your memories!!! good on ya

    and post below
    *love the gold cost pics....wowsa that jellyfish is huge!!!
    *love the amy tan book..and cute pic of C and those shoes!!!
    *love your PL title page too!!!

  2. what a beautiful post. i've felt this same way OFTEN. xoxoox



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